ABC is launching a new service based on the premise that consumers will understand that to see their favorite shows any time they want they will realize that they must watch commercials. The way it works is like this. First the service keeps you from fast forwarding on your DVR. Next whenever you tune to ABC, someone comes into your home and chains you to your chair, inserts a catheter into your bladder, and stands ready to fetch you any food you might want. This person also will answer any phone calls, or knocks at the door that might occur during the period you are watching the show. And should you get a bit drowsy, the ABC watcher will smack you on the back of the head.
Look for CBS and NBC to follow suit soon.
